As we approach St. Valentine’s Day, a day celebrated across the world for love and affection, it is an opportune moment to reflect on the deeper meaning of love as envisioned by our Catholic Faith. For those called to the vocation of marriage, the path to this sacrament is not just a pursuit of companionship, but a journey toward sanctity. This Valentine’s Day, let us pause to consider what true love is, and how we can live it in a way that leads us to holiness.
St. Valentine, a martyr of the early Church, is remembered for his commitment to love—both to God and to his fellow human beings. His feast day reminds us of the sacredness of love, especially the self-giving love that marriage requires. In his life, St. Valentine demonstrated that love is not simply a fleeting emotion, but a deep commitment that often requires sacrifice. His own martyrdom is a testament to a love that transcends personal comfort and seeks the good of others above all.
For those discerning a vocation to marriage, this is the first and most important lesson: love is not about what we get from it, but what we give. True love is sacrificial, selfless, and enduring. It’s not always easy, and it’s rarely convenient. In the words of Pope St. John Paul II:
Since the Cross of Christ is the sign of love and salvation, we should not be surprised that all true love requires sacrifice. Do not be afraid, then, when love makes demands. Do not be afraid when love requires sacrifice. Do not be afraid of the Cross of Christ.
Marriage is a path to holiness, not just happiness. In the modern world, it can often seem like marriage is solely about finding a soulmate who will make us happy. While companionship is an important and beautiful aspect of marriage, it is only part of the picture. In God’s design, marriage is a sacrament, and its ultimate goal is holiness. As married couples, we are called to become saints—each day striving to be the husband or wife our spouse deserves, reflecting Christ’s love through our actions, words, and prayers.
If you are not yet married, this doesn’t mean you are exempt from striving toward this ideal. In fact, it is in the time of dating and preparation for marriage that you are called to cultivate the virtues necessary for a successful and holy marriage. Pray for your future spouse. Ask God to guide you to the one who will walk alongside you in this vocation. Be intentional about living chastity, as the Church teaches, saving yourself for marriage. This act of purity is not a denial of love, but a means of protecting it for the sacred bond that marriage is meant to be. Chastity fosters self-control, reverence for the other, and an understanding that the love we share with our spouse is a holy, lifelong commitment.
Catholic teaching on love and sexuality is undoubtedly countercultural. The world often promotes a view of love that is self-serving and disposable, but God’s vision for love is different. He calls us to a love that is faithful, fruitful, and enduring. Conjugal love, as the Church teaches, is meant to be open to life and ordered toward the good of both spouses. It is a love that reflects Christ’s sacrificial love for His Church.
So, as we celebrate St. Valentine’s Day, let us remember that love is not just about romantic gestures or fleeting emotions. It is about preparing ourselves to be saints, praying for the spouse God has for us, and living in a way that is worthy of the sacrament of marriage. May this reflection on St. Valentine’s Day inspire us to live love as God intended, and to become the husbands and wives that our future spouses deserve, and the world needs.
